Martha and the vandals

“What the…? Will you look at that, Randal? Come here and look what someone did to my sculpture!”

“What? Looks the same to me, Martha.”

“Call the Police, Randal!”

“It was plain vandalism, Officer Neoapollotano. I want fingerprints and I want the vandals found! They took Randal’s obsidian arrowhead he made in graduate school. He could make stone tools like a…Neandertal.”

“Can you put a value on the arrowhead…?”

“You are missing the point, Officer. What about the vandalism?”

“I understand, Mrs. Warwickii. I would be upset, too, if I found…THAT in my yard before I had my morning coffee.”

Friday Fictioneers
Photo prompt: copyright Douglas M. Macilroy
Word Count: 100

Thanks to Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for hosting Friday Fictioneers.

The last moral man

“I’m telling you this story because you are the only person I can trust not to judge me…

I was a soldier in the Russian Army. We were in a country which we were fighting since 1795, when Mother Russia was an Empire.

The witch and the dragon

 

Today he felt better than he did all week–having cleansed himself in an ocean of blood. The demons were gone–perhaps never to return. That in itself was well worth the effort. He could hear the screams of rancor and derision–spitting on his countenance in a fury of profanity…oh, they were angry.

An Actor’s Tale: if wishes were Porsches

The following tale is the fourth in a series about the misadventure of a talented, Shakespearian actor. This chapter is in response to a flash fiction challenge and can stand by itself. Links to chapters 1-3 can be found in the “Related” section at the end of this post.

The Culling of Pelham 123

Corruption can be defined in several ways such as  depravity and decadence of one who is wicked. One’s tooth can decay and so can a radioactive isotope. A sleaze-bag can be crooked and a scum-bag can be guilty of misconduct.

The Terrible Two’s

“You smell terrible. What happened?”

“I’ll tell you after I bathe Roger and I take a shower. I’m beat right now….”

“You can’t come in. The storm knocked out the electric so you can’t take a shower. There are horse flies buzzing around you.”

I Went to a Garden Party to Reminisce

I’ve got no one. I’m alone. I’m housebound. I’m in pain…constant, gnawing, gripping pain. Nothing works for the pain…I do not want to live like this any more. Let me die, then there will be no more pain….

Walking on the Sun

Nazca Desert, Peru

“Yes, hello?”

“Ma, it’s me.”

“Me, who?”

“Very funny. You left a message. Said it’s very important?”

“Not too important, DeDe.”

“Ma, I’m in the middle of nowhere in the Nazca Desert, bouncing this expensive call off a satellite heading for Jupiter. What is it?”

Favors and Other Lovers

“Stewart are you in here?”

“What do you want, Whitney? Make it fast, I’ve got to take the Ferrari out for a spin. I tightened up a few things and I want to make sure they don’t come loose.”

“What things? Like what?”

“Whitney, if I told you, you wouldn’t understand. Let’s just say it had something to do with the steering distributor system, okay?”

Artifact: A Carny Point of View

*
My name is Mike Kandinsky and I manage a carnival. We tour the Midwest, mostly, and Canada. It’s a substantial show, and while other carnies are trimming down, and cutting their venues, we just keep on growing. It all comes down to scheduling and demographics. And a nephew in economics at MIT doesn’t hurt.

Calling Mr. Churchill

 

---

“Name.”

“Sir Winston Leonard Spencer-Churchill.”

“Date of Birth.”

“November 30, in the year of our Lord…ah…ah…1924.”

“Are you sure about that?  I have here that you were born in 1874.”

A Ransom is announced

“What is it Zola?  Let me see what you have there.  Oh, crap.  Your cat is being held for ransom? What is that about, girl?”

Icing on the cake

 

“Well, He does work in mysterious ways.  Seems like it’s all here. Wherever did the penniless Lucas Vang get $7000 cash?”

“I suppose that’s a rhetorical question, Mr. Snake, so I won’t bother answering it.”

“Suit yourself. We’re done. Take your fine self out of here.  See he leaves, Guido.”

The Prattle of Littledog and Bighorn

*
Littledog: “Hey, you with the Princess Leia…thingies.  Whataya in for?”

Bighorn: “I’m in for the day, actually.”

Flash Fiction Challenge #5 – The Break

“Doesn’t she work here anymore? I talked with her every evening.  She never said anything…”

“Allen, you know as much as I do. I’ve tried calling her on her cell and your home phone but no one ever answers.  I even stopped by your house a few times but no one came to the door when I rang the bell…”