Windows 10 and pain management

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I’ve been on morphine for over a year now due to the ridiculous list of surgeries. I’ve been on Windows 10 for a few months–maybe 3, maybe 5 months, maybe more. I’m not sure because of morphine. I have a memory of updating my notebook from Windows 8.1 to 10 resulting in each of my mahjongg games crashing my notebook. I mourned the loss of sound on my notebook as I was being wheeled into the OR for the 6th surgery. Continue reading

The return of the excessive gardener?

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Well, after six surgeries on my left leg last year–the sixth being in October–I am finally back. Left with a lot of complications from the last surgery, I am only now conscious of my surroundings. Imagine my surprise at the number of changes to WordPress. Continue reading

Off again

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In a few hours I’m off to hospital for fourth (4) surgery on my knee, on the same leg as the broken ankle. I’ll be off the air for a few weeks. See you when I get back.  Lucy

 

A dark cloud followeth me

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At least one of these images is not that of a ski boot. It’s not the latest fashion footwear, nor is it a device for strengthening one’s ankle in preparation for “Dancing with the Stars”. It is most decidedly not that freakishly, strappy, astronaut pump that Neil Armstrong would have looked smart wearing for mankind’s first footstep on the Moon and when worn, it makes driving a 2000 5-speed Toyota MR2 Spyder convertible a tad awkward. Continue reading

Clown shoes

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My name is Mike Kandinsky and I manage a carnival. We tour the Midwest, mostly, and parts of Canada. My sidekick is Maude Lemon who used to be the bearded lady. We have a kid together–she’s living with Maude’s Aunt Polly in St. Paul.  Maude shaved and changed careers and now manages a couple of the attractions.

Physics and the English muffin

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Look at the size of the muffins in the above image. One could easily make Eggs Benedict for two on those muffin halves. An “Egg McMuffin” would be pure gluttony! I realize it’s difficult to read the caption :  “Pull a Thomas’ English Muffin gently apart with your fingers and you’ll discover…ridges and valleys that toast to a golden perfection….. Thomas’ Promises!”
Continue reading

Hi, Ma, it’s me

 

Rio Grande Zoo Main Entrance by C. Burnett

Rio Grande Zoo Main Entrance by C. Burnett

“Hi, Ma, it’s me.”

“Ellie?”

“No, Ma, your favorite daughter.”

“De De, I was just thinking about you. You finally decided to call me?”

“You know how to dial the phone. You can call me.”

“You never answer and I don’t like talking to that machine.”

“You’re weird, Ma. I sent you a card. Did you like the photos?”

“Oh, I took them to my volunteer job at the Hospital and showed them to all my volunteers. That Roger looks just like a Polar Bear. Some of them thought he was a Polar Bear but I told them he’s my daughter’s Golden Retriever. Continue reading

Martha and the vandals

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“What the…? Will you look at that, Randal? Come here and look what someone did to my sculpture!”

“What? Looks the same to me, Martha.”

“Call the Police, Randal!”

“It was plain vandalism, Officer Neoapollotano. I want fingerprints and I want the vandals found! They took Randal’s obsidian arrowhead he made in graduate school. He could make stone tools like a…Neandertal.”

“Can you put a value on the arrowhead…?”

“You are missing the point, Officer. What about the vandalism?”

“I understand, Mrs. Warwickii. I would be upset, too, if I found…THAT in my yard before I had my morning coffee.”

Friday Fictioneers
Photo prompt: copyright Douglas M. Macilroy
Word Count: 100

Thanks to Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for hosting Friday Fictioneers.

Excuse me, is this Club Med?

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Here’s a little something I wrote in the beginning of March at my stay at what we used to call a “Nursing Home”. It’s not surprising that I didn’t publish it. It was just around that time that the antibiotics were taking their toll on me and I was losing weight at an alarming rate…like that’s a bad thing. Continue reading

Zombie dating

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Let’s talk about  zombie dating services. Yes, there is such a thing as zombies dating–virtually. However, there is no such thing as a zombie–not in reality. But, then, one has to remember all those Star Trek Conventions one went to over the years dressed in various Star Fleet uniforms and then zombie dating becomes understandable. Continue reading

Garden requiem in excelsis

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Surely you should be dead by now hibiscus

 

So this is another Florida winter!  After days of temperatures in the 70’s F (20’s C), having to turn on the AC (mostly because RM has been suffering hot flashes), it is early morning, at the time of writing, and 59 F (15 C). I am cold but I dare not turn on the furnace for fear it would wake my roommates, and I do enjoy my quiet early mornings. Continue reading

The importance of being obsessive

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“The Desk Set” (1957) with Spencer Tracy and Katharine Hepburn

My Mother was a Werewolf

The high school I went to was a Nun-run college prep school, hence, the term, “preppy”.  Back then Connecticut was loaded with private prep schools and if you were from Connecticut all young adults were considered to be “preppies”. Continue reading

Move over Mendel

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A word about golden rice. It’s a genetically modified rice which is the only variety in existence which can produce beta carotene: vitamin A. Now vitamin A is necessary to prevent blindness in the malnourished and therefore, vitamin deficient, small children as well as pregnant women of the world–not to mention, the rice will feed them. Continue reading

A word about rice

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I am a rice person. I will eat rice with some butter (margarine is scary and butter is full of perils) and Parmesan cheese (cheeses are mucus forming…I don’t know why we eat the stuff) I might throw in some veggies or whatever is in the fridge–be sure to check everything while in there–RM buys veggies just for their decomposition value and she ignores expiration dates. Continue reading

Gunga Din and me: revisited

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I grew up in a family of devoted readers.  My history with books began with my mother reading to me, and most importantly, reading to me at bedtime.  I read so many books as a child. I loved Grimm’s Fairy tales and  I remember savoring Pippi Longstocking books, and as I grew my tastes grew with me.   In second grade our teacher would end each day by reading to us.   “Gulliver’s Travels” carried me off on strange and splendid adventures. Continue reading

Mostly Dead Tree Mostly Gone

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Trees are nature’s wondrous edifices. They provide food, shelter, and shade…a place for a swing or tree house, or just a place to climb for fun or from danger. Trees make oxygen and absorb carbon dioxide and in forests and jungles–rain forests, are the engines of the planet’s climate–driving the planet’s rains. Continue reading

The dog and potty show

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It’s become a cliché to step outside the box, so, let’s step outside your house, stand in the street or on the sidewalk, depending on traffic–turn, and look at your house. Don’t worry how it looks because you’re going to have to imagine how you and the other occupants of your house look to your neighbors. And so, another lesson to be learned by my criticizing Christian with a big “C” roommate (RM). Continue reading